hello friend

Here’s the thing. Motherhood is hard, and our struggles are real. We are in dire need of finding Grace in the mishmash of our daily lives, which is why I created this space. This site is somewhere for you to feel safe pulling back the veil on all the broken and challenging parts of motherhood while embracing the laughter and joy of the beautiful moments. Consider your visit here a rush of grace in both directions.

Here’s the other thing. Authenticity heals. I want you to feel loved and accepted for who you are, precisely where you’re at. Leaning into each other and sharing stories helps us realize we aren’t alone on a motherhood island. Although our experiences are unique, we share the same emotional shore. I’m a firm believer that it takes a village to care for the village, Mommas. We need each other, and this village is for you.

let's connect

grace notes

This friend letter comes to your inbox once a month with all sorts of things including one new blog post, links to other stories I share around the web, books and podcasts I’m enjoying, and an early heads-up about all things new and fun. When you subscribe, you will receive 3 FREE Chapters of my new book with Lisa Leshaw, “How Are You Feeling, Momma? (You don’t need to say, “I’m fine.”)

feeling overwhelmed, momma?

Have you ever laid awake at night and asked yourself, “Why do other moms seem to have it all together when I’m over here exhausted and drowning in my emotions? Will I ever figure this mom thing out and feel like I’m enough for my kids? When does the worry end?”


If you have, you’re not alone.

Wouldn’t it be great to have somewhere to turn when you’re feeling stuck in the muck like this? Something that can help get you from feeling alone and overwhelmed to feeling encouraged and full of hope?

To meet this need, my friend, Lisa, and I wrote, How Are You Feeling, Momma? (You don’t need to say, “I’m fine.”). It is a collection of 62 candid and honest stories from our motherhood journey that give you two perspectives in dealing with 31 momma emotions we all try to manage.  You’ll find practical tools and over 70 scripture verses to help you feel fully loved, fully seen, and fully heard as a mom as you cling to God’s promises and find love and encouragement from other moms who understand your struggles. Sometimes simply knowing we aren’t alone in how we feel is enough to help us do hard things.

Momma, you know what it feels like to be overwhelmed. You know how emotional overload can steal your joy and your sleep, which is why you long for peace and contentment. Why you long to feel like you are enough and doing right by your kids. Lisa and I would love to be friends who can speak encouragement into your circumstances and hope into your heart. So, take care of YOU and buy this book because you deserve it.

motherhood booklife

Publisher’s Weekly 2020 BookLife Prize Finalist

“Thank you, Shelby and Lisa, for creating a work that stitches us closer together in a time of such unraveling. Thank you for sparking heartfelt vulnerability with your questions and sharing your lives, pointing me back to God’s goodness and truth in the process.I appreciated Spear’s and Leshaw’s commitment to offering this work as a joint gift to moms. Their different faith backgrounds enriched the reflections and was an example of real-life unity in relationship. In a time where many Americans are divided along the religious and political spectrums, it was refreshing to receive their words. As a momma myself, I found the short chapters honest, approachable, and catalysts of meaningful personal reflection. Thank you, Shelby and Lisa, for creating a work that stitches us closer together in a time of such unraveling.”

– Ashlee Eiland, author of Human(Kind): How Reclaiming Human Worth and Embracing Radical Kindness Will Bring Us Back Together

Rescripting Motherhood: Changing the stories we believe about our worth, competence, and daily experiences

When it comes to our role as moms, what stories are we believing about our value and worth? What narratives are we spinning about our enoughness? What tales are we telling about our day-to-day circumstances?

Our beliefs matter and will either empower or disempower us. These beliefs impact our thoughts, which then create our reality. So, what we think about and where we focus our attention also matters. The good news is, we are in total control of what we believe and think. I’ll be sharing how a ‘change the way you look at things so the things you look at change’ mindset moves you from overwhelm to optimism, guilt to grace, & confusion to clarity in motherhood. We’ll talk about:

  • paying attention to the stories we are believing about our worth
  • getting our inside world–our mind and heart–put right
  • how to shift our perspective on things so we can heal and enjoy what is rather than railing against what isn’t
  • why letting go of the ‘shoulds’ and saying no to expectations is a portal to freedom
  • and so much more…

You will learn all the tools and practices I’ve implemented to help me change my world and hear stories about the transformation process to encourage and inspire you that real change can happen. And I’ll shower you with all kinds of love along the way.

some words from others

“Shelby writes the words of every momma’s heart. She is wise and wonderful and her words bring unity and joy.” ~ Jami Amerine, friend and author of Stolen Jesus: An Unconventional Search for the Real Savior and Sacred Ground, Sticky Floors


“Shelby renews your spirit and rejuvenates your soul, making you want to look deeply to discover your inner beauty & find your best voice.” ~ Lisa Leshaw, friend and co-author of How Are You Feeling, Momma? and author at Guideposts & Chicken Soup for the Soul