Mommas, if your kids are at that stage when they’re growing up and transitioning into the mode of:

  • Seriousness
  • One-word answers
  • Eye-rolling
  • Huff-n-puff
  • I don’t want to talk to you
  • This game night is dumb
  • Don’t hug me in public
  • I want to be by myself
  • I’d rather play video games
  • You don’t know anything
  • You’ll never get it

or, in other words, all things ‘leave me alone,’ I encourage you to despair not.

The child who giggled non-stop, rolled around on the floor, played with you until dusk, tugged on your leg, and lit up an entire room with a smile simply because you entered their field of vision still exists. The lighthearted bundle of joy who wanted your never-ending attention & chatted both your ears off is still very much inside their more grown-up body.

The kiddo who once had no idea embarrassment was an emotion or any concept that ‘being cool’ was a thing is just taking a pause. They just need to find their place in the world and learn how to deal with big emotions & social paradigms. How to maneuver internal changes & external pressures. Once true north is on their horizon, the walls will crumble. Then they will morph into adulthood and learn to play again as if no one is watching. They’ll appreciate your existence, look forward to spending time with you, and once again value your input.

Below is a video of my 22-year-old baby who asked me to go to the park with her a couple of weeks ago to film a music video for a song she wrote.

[su_youtube url=”https://youtu.be/vJNE0JiPU4I”]

The thing about our time together was this:

  1. She wanted me there
  2. She asked for my help.
  3. She didn’t have a care in the world as she focused on her craft.

This clip is one of my favorite moments that I captured on my phone as she was filming herself pretending to play hide and seek. The goal was to come across like she was having a blast playing a game with someone she loves. Before running around the tree, she “got into character” by flailing her arms around to make herself laugh. Watching her crack herself up was priceless and I pressed every second deep into my mom heart.

These moments when your adult kid shows flashes of yesteryear will open up the memory bank and a flood of ‘I remember when’s’ will pour out of you and fill you with joy from head to toe. In fact, these gifts are so impactful you’ll forget you ever went through the seasons of sulkiness, sass, & silence.

Trust me. The time will come.

xo

 

 

 

Mommas, how is your mom heart? Do you have a zillion emotions swirling inside you? Welp. You are NOT alone in how you feel. All of us struggle to keep up with the constant roller coaster of feelings and this book, How Are You Feeling, Momma? (You don’t need to say, “I’m fine.”) that I co-wrote with Lisa Leshaw talks about how we tried to manage and find our way through the ups and downs of motherhood. Grab a copy today for you or a momma friend. GREAT GIFT for baby showers, birthdays, holidays, and more. $10 at Amazon and Barnes & Noble!

Shelby is a Certified Emotional Intelligence Coach, Certified Meditation Teacher (CMT), author, freelance writer, speaker, and love enthusiast who is passionate about helping others ‘change the way they look at things so the things they look at change.’ She has numerous stories featured in the national publication, Guideposts. She also has over 160 featured articles at online publications, including Her View From Home, Scary Mommy, Parenting Teens & Tweens, For Every Mom, Love What Matters, and Today. Her book, How Are You Feeling, Momma? (You don’t need to say, “I’m fine.”), co-authored with her dear friend, Lisa Leshaw, recently won the 2020 Publisher’s Weekly Book Life Prize as the finalist in the Inspirational/Spiritual category.

by Shelby Spear